A common reason of failure is belief. We believe the wrong things about ourselves. Self-help gurus usually say that in order to succeed you must believe in yourself. Have you hear that one before?
Though the attribute of self-belief is a powerful one, it isn't the reason you fail or succeed. Self-belief teachings only work because they instill in you the sense that you are all together completely whole. That is not true. Yes, you must believe in yourself to succeed at anything in life, but by prioritizing believing in yourself, you are putting your absolute trust on a flawed person.
We are humans and one thing that does harm us are the images that we have of ourselves. We constantly tell ourselves what we can and cannot do, what we can or cannot be, and this is all based upon the way we think of ourselves.
We need a crucial mind shift.
When I believe in myself, it isn't because I am some perfect being who has all of the answers inside. Rather, it is because I am aware of what has been deposited in me. That's the kicker. Everything that you believe has been deposited in you already. You have been programmed to believe certain facts. Those belief systems affect your behavior. So if you have the wrong facts (merely opinions) in you then you'll live the wrong way. If you have the truth in you, you'll be free.
So it is crucial that you understand this: God has this amazing purpose for your life. It's already in you. You may not realize it yet or, you do know that but you don't know what or how it is to be manifested.
If everything that you believe about yourself has been deposited by outside sources then you need to reconsider if you're believing the truth. For most people that I coach, I see that their believes have been shaped by the opinions of men, rather than the One who gives us our purpose.
You may think that you don't cater your life to what people think of you but I would encourage to notice why you do the things you do, spend on the things you spend on, post the things you post. Those are exterior indicators of what is in the inside. Furthermore, what you believe about God will definitely influence the way you live your life.
the opinions of men are not your anchor
Our beliefs anchor us. I remember that from the moment I was young I loved to speak in public. Why? It was by grace that I received that gift and so from a young age I began to develop that skill. Yet, as I got older I started to speak because I loved the feedback I was getting from people. And people would begin to give me credit for the gift.
That doesn't make sense.
But my pride took over and I began to speak more and more because I was in demand. People would book me months in advance because, even as a young preacher, I still had all these other things in life I was wrongly prioritizing.
Because I gave my reason of speaking to the praises of men, I became a slave to the opinions of men. If people would tell me I did a great job then I would feel like a million bucks. If people didn't respond the way I thought they should, then I would question why I was even doing this. It would hurt!
You might be going through the same thing. You do because you're told you do good or you don't because you've been rejected, criticized, accused, or made fun of. The opinions of people become our anchor. They keep us from moving and advancing. They do not allow us to grow. I use the metaphor of an anchor because I love the ocean so much but you could substitute it for handcuffs, ball and chain, whatever.
You are not free if you live your life based on the opinions of men.
the truth does set you free
It was His grace that allowed me to see the truth. I learned that as a created being, God (the creator) is the one who sets the purpose in me. As such, He gives me all the necessary functions to carry out my life's purpose.
Your existence is not an accident. It is not a coincidence. It is purposed for a greater good that is working in you and will contribute through you. I am sadden by the many people I see in this world that are slaves to immediate pleasures and the approvals of others than enjoying a freedom in fulfilling their destiny.
So when I realized that it wasn't me or men that gives purpose or a calling, then I realized where my value came from.
From then on, it didn't matter if I received a "good job" or a "that speech was amazing" from people. Even receiving compliments now, about anything, doesn't hold the weight that it once used to.
Why not? Because the truth is that my value doesn't even come from what I do. The value of my life is based upon God's grace towards me that allows me to live His purpose for my life.
If I always think about where the source of my purpose comes from then I will always be empowered to live out my calling. You will too!
Think about it: If He called you, He will equip you. That means that it doesn't matter what people think of you. The only thing that matters is the truth. That truth will set you free.