I am surveying all of you who constantly go on wishing things were different in your lives. Pinpoint exactly what changes you desire in your world. You might be anxious to fix your relationships, to get rid of all of your problems.
Just list them. Do you want to be healthier? Grow your business? Finish school? Get out of debt?
What changes would you like to see?
I know that I have things in my life that I want changed too. So here’s the kicker: Are you ready to make the necessary changes in you to get accomplish your dreams?
Look, if you want to change your circumstances, you need to first change yourself. You need to change the things about you that got you where you currently are. Yes, as much as you want to blame others, or the economy, or the lack of resources for your current situation, the truth is that you allowed yourself to get where you are.
Change Needs to be Intentional
Change won’t happen unless you want it to happen.
You have to be intentional in your growth. James Allen says:
Some negative people consistently complain about the monotony in their lives, yet they won’t do a thing to change the redundancy of their thinking.
Positive change does not happen on accident. When I looked at the people around me who were successful in their fitness, business, relationships, finances, and leadership, I noticed that they arrived there through actions. They didn’t just sit still and wait for things to happen. They made things happen. They believed for them, prayed for them, and in faith, worked towards those things.
They knew that their perseverance would grant them their labor’s reward. You have to get ready to work through so much adversity (some of it internal, most of it external) and be diligent enough to exercise patience. You have to commit to the change or you’ll never grow.
Change can be bipolar in the sense that sometimes we are desiring it so much that we get fearful of what it would take to change. Therefore, we don’t change. Or you want it so much that you would do anything to get it.
I spent many years regretting the things I didn’t do. I spent time regretting not continuing on to graduate school or entering into the workforce at a younger age. I wandered through years thinking as to what my purpose was. But that’s all I did. I wandered without aim. I wasn’t clear on what I wanted.
It took several years to get to the point where I was ready for change. I didn’t want to keep convincing myself that I was being of service to God by staying busy. I had to realize that I needed to change internally. I needed to stop regretting what I didn’t do and I needed to focus on what I could do. I stopped waiting for my life to change and prepared myself for the changes that were to come.
Are you waiting for someday?
You might be reading this and think, “well, things are going to change for me someday. . . .”
“I’ll go back to school someday . . .”
“Someday, I will start that business I’ve been dreaming of . . .”
When people tell me that they’ll do something someday, I pull out the calendar and show them that someday does not exist. I show them that there is Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Someday is not a day of the week.
Put yourself in a position of control and look at the calendar and schedule the beginning of your change because the reality is someday may never come.
You’re not alone. Procrastinators all over the world have always delayed the changes they need to make because of fear. But that doesn’t have to be your reality for your life anymore.
Again, your results are driven by intentional actions and not by accident.
One day, I was seeking guidance from my dad on what to do with the rest of my life. I was engaged and scared sick as to what my life would become if I didn’t seek to do God’s will. At that time, I didn’t understand what His will was for me, but I knew that it had nothing to do with what I was doing or the way I was living my life.
So I began to pray about it, seeking God’s wisdom through His Word and the book of Proverbs became my obsession. I kept reading about how wisdom was the thing that I should seek above all things and how the Lord uses those who are wise to bless others. I read that intelligence was the essence of a mighty man.
I wanted to become that man that was used by God to bless others. I didn’t want to live my life for myself. I wanted divine wisdom to be a key foundation for my marriage and life.
From that point on I started to invest in myself. I bought more books than usual. I consumed them, highlighted them, scribbled notes in them, and then when I was finished, I would reread them.
I started listening to intelligent people speak about their experiences and my mind began to expand. I took courses to become a better communicator and Spanish speaker. Improvement was the name of the game.
That led me to become part of the John Maxwell Team, an international group of certified leadership speakers and coaches. What a breakthrough that was for me. I received mentors that to this day continue to pour so much knowledge and wisdom in me.
I am grateful to God that I now have been coaching and speaking for the betterment of others; It has been beyond fulfilling for me to inspire people to greatness.
I want you to understand that you too can grow far more that you ever thought possible and that you can accomplish your dreams. But you’ve got to first believe it for yourself.
Be more afraid of the fear
A mentor of mine told me that everyone is fearful at first, but to overcome it, you just have to be more afraid of fearing things.
Believe me, it isn’t easy to muster up the faith it takes to change. Fear of the unknown can be paralyzing to some. For others, change means living a different way and that takes you out of your comfort zone.
If you read your Bible, you’ll notice that many men were hesitant of God’s calling. They feared the purpose so much that some were willing to disobey. Yet, God shows us, through those stories, that if He calls you towards your purpose, He will never leave you. That should give you the hope to overcome fear.
Try Something New
There has to be a set of actions that are holding you back. You might be so used to doing what you normally do that you don’t even notice how attached to those things you are. It’s just a way of life for you.
Do you continually go back to people or to habits that you know are not good for you? Drop them now!
For me, it was watching to much TV on Netflix. I binged watched 24 one summer and I enjoyed every minute of watching Jack Bauer overcome every threat to our national security. But none of that entertainment made me more money. None of those fulfilled me. None of those episodes gave me the skills I needed to succeed in my life. Watching tv didn’t help me grow closer to my loved ones. It didn’t improve my fitness. It just made me comfortable.
So I removed the TV from my bedroom. I canceled my Netflix account. I took away the clear path to wasting time. That’s what I did.
You need to decided for yourself what you will eliminate in your personal life for the sake of change.
Embrace The Difference
Change won’t feel as good as staying the same. Welcome those uneasy feelings as a sign that you’re making progress. Accept that things won’t be the same.
If you try hard to keep things as they were while trying to change you will sabotage your success. It’s like a eating unhealthy while trying to lose weight. The contradiction will only lead to failure.
Embrace the fact that the differences you’re making are altering your life for the better.
Place Realistic Goals in Front of You
You may feel all too inspired to change every single thing that you want but things hardly change from one day to the next.
People don’t change that fast. We are creatures of habit. Therefore, you need to set realistic expectations for yourself.
Saying, “I will make $100,000 this year as an entrepreneur," when you’ve never been in business before can put pressure on you that may cause you to fail fast.
Instead, aim for the habits that a successful entrepreneur has.
Get up early. Get business expertise. Surround yourself with mentors. Find a coach to bring the best out of you. This applies for anything else you may want to change.
As you aim to apply the proper habits that will lead you to change successfully, you’ll notice that you’ll become more confident because you are hitting your goals. You can always increase the “difficulty” of your goals as you progress, but always make them attainable.
Stay Plugged In
You are not alone in this journey. There are many others who are trying to change just like you. They may be trying to get out of debt, lose weight, start or grow their business, become more confident, finish school, etc.
Find a community of like-minded individuals to draw support from. You all could inspire each other and hold one another accountable. This is a massive step.
Every week I meet with a particular individual who brainstorms with me and brings out my very best. He reaches out to me throughout the week to see how I’m following through my projects and goals. This kind of partnership is invaluable!
Also, get connected to someone you can learn from. Ask someone to mentor you. It could be informal or formal. You need the guidance they will provide and being connected to someone who can lead you will take you higher faster than you could on your own.
Again, every week I am on the phone with one of my mentors. They challenge me to strive for better things, to believe for the good, and to trust God in spite of all my obstacles. Those weekly calls have provided me with the tools and systems to running a successful business. I’ve become a better leader as a result of having a coach.
So do not go at it this alone. Set aside the time to meet up with people who will not tolerate wasting time but will journey along with you.
Talk to me
I want to know what changes you'll be pursuing. Leave a comment or send me a message. I'm more than happy to pray for you.
Look, I'm rooting for your success so don't think that there is such a thing as an insignificant change.
Share this post with your family and loved ones. You never know who you might inspire.
- Fredy J. Romero